There’s always a scurry around this time of year. We’re all rushing and running around trying to finish things up, meet deadlines and quotas, squeezing in the last bit of opportunities that are to be found in 2012 before it becomes the year that was.
I’ve admittedly been the same. My days have been filled to the brim with thinking ahead, and planning ahead and doing. This is not unimportant, don’t misunderstand me. But I find, that somewhere in all this doing, I start coping, and not really living anymore. There’s always something that needs to be done. ALWAYS. Unfortunately, in the process of all this doing and losing myself in all the things that called out for my attention, something obvious (in hindsight, off course) began to happen: I actually began to lose myself. No new song to speak of, no good reads to report. No beautiful scenery seen. I run straight past people I love, without even a notice or an acknowledgement, because I’m off on a mission to get things done.
It’s been getting out of hand.
So I’ve given myself a time out. I don’t WANT to live my life like this: moving straight through the moments in my life, and thinking about the NEXT one, while I’m still in THIS moment. Jim Elliot, a guy whose life (albeit, short) has inspired me offers such wisdom: Wherever you are, be all there. Live to the hilt every situation you believe to be God’s will for you.
Lately, I haven’t been doing that truth any justice.
So today I’m giving myself a time out. And it looks like this: Blogging, and writing in general. Writing a piece of music for some beautiful lyrics. Dreaming. Adding things onto my bucket list. Walking slower. Paying attention. Looking at beautiful pictures.
Speaking to some beautiful ladies a few weeks ago, I said something that I didn’t know I was going to say, and that is coming to the forefront of my mind today: Don’t live half.
I feel like I hear voices in the back of my head cheering me on and applauding as I say that. Now, to live it.